Satire on the “If Someone Has More Than Me” meme-
If A Man has a House Stacked to the Ceiling with Newspapers, We Call Him Crazy
If A Woman has a Trailer House full of Cats, We Call Her Nuts
When People Pathologically Hoard so much Cash that they Impoverish Others, We put them on the cover of Fortune Magazine and pretend they are Role Models
If Someone has a House Stacked to the Ceiling with Books, Ok, Where ever this is going, I Think I’m Being Insulted!
ATTACKER (shouting, hiding behind a car): “No! Wait! Stop!”
ATTACKER: “Damn it, stop!”
ATTACKER: “Stop shooting at me you assholes! I’m not a zombie!”
JUDD: “Damn Mike! A talking zombie!”
MIKE: “Don’t care. Flush him out.”
ATTACKER: “Stop! Stop it!”
JUDD: “We saw you eating that gal, you f**kin’ zombie!”
ATTACKER: “Okay, fine! I’m a cannibal you gun happy idiots! Not a zombie!”
MIKE: “That’s better how?”
ATTACKER: “She was already dead! There’s no food! I’m Starving!”
JUDD: “Not for long!”
JUDD: “That may be a point. What do you think Mike?”
MIKE: “You can’t be serious.”
JUDD: “Maybe that woman was already dead.”
MIKE: “Then why wasn’t she moving around? And who the hell eats a zombie?”
JUDD: “Starvation can do things to a person’s mind.”
MIKE: “There’s a line, Judd. Once a person goes cannibal, it remains an option.”
Judd and Mike quickly look behind them, at the body, just in case. A partially eaten woman, wounds oozing fresh blood, lies a small distance behind them.
One shot hits the dead woman’s head. Attacker sees it.
MIKE: “And there won’t be.”
ATTACKER (shouting): “Whoa! So, are we cool?”
Mike and Judd look at each other, sizing up the request.
ATTACKER: “Hey! Are we cool?”
JUDD: “Stand up where we can see you, hands over your head.”
Attacker hesitantly stands, arms raised, hands empty.
ATTACKER: “So it’s cool? We’re okay?”
Gunshot. Attacker’s head twists back and he drops.
MIKE: “We are now.”
I’m not exactly making a killing off of my book
PERPETUAL BULLET: A Science Fiction Collection
A trove of previously published Science Fiction Horror Thriller – plus bonus stories
Featuring: Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem!
By E.C. McMullen Jr.
Now on sale for $9.00 in Trade Paperback and in eBook for $1.99 and available for your Android Tablet, iPad, Kindle, Nook, and every other “E”!
Find it at (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Diesel, !ndigo, iTunes, KoboBooks, Smashwords, WHSmith, and more).
Also look for my story Cedo Looked Like People, in the anthology, FEAR THE REAPER, edited by Joe Mynhardt and available in Paperback and eBook.
Looking for a great guidebook on filmmaking? Interviews with Ray Bradbury, Wes Craven, John Carpenter, Tom Holland, Jeffrey Reddick, George A. Romero, me, and many others in HORROR 201: The Silver Scream.