I'll be your Bartender today

I got a call from New York.

On the message they left I could make out my somewhat enunciated name and the number I should call back. The rest of the message was the worst mangling of the English language I’d ever heard in my life!

It was like someone with a mouthful of marbles trying to speak to me while gargling: Fully unintelligible.

Minutes later they called back a second time, sounded like the same person, again enunciating my name and the phone number I should call, and obliterating everything else.

I can’t even guess at the accent: Anything from German to Pakistani.

It’s actually angered me so much that I blocked their freaking number.

Gargling at me with a mouthful of marbles? How DARE you speak to me that way?


wb2016Enjoy refreshingly clear communication when you buy my book, WILLOW BLUE.
It’s my second collection of critically acclaimed short stories with all of the Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem, you’ve come to expect (or should by now). Available in paperback for $8.00 or in Kindle for only $1.99. Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free! The tales will last you longer than latte!

Own it and want more? Buy
PERPETUAL BULLET: A Science Fiction Collection.
It’s a veritable trove of previously published Science Fiction Horror Thriller tales – plus bonus stories
Featuring: Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem!
Now on sale for $9.00 in Trade Paperback and in eBook for $1.99 and available for your Android Tablet, iPad, Kindle, Nook, and every other “E”!
Find it at (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Diesel, !ndigo, iTunes, KoboBooks, Smashwords, WHSmith, and more).
Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free!

Have you become a fan?

Look for my story Cedo Looked Like People, in the anthology, FEAR THE REAPER, edited by Joe Mynhardt. Available from Crystal Lake Publishing and available in Print for $12.99 or eBook for $2.99.

Also available from Crystal Lake Publishing, the film making guidebook, HORROR 201: The Silver Scream. Reap the rewards of movie making experience from the likes of Myself, as well as  John Carpenter, Tom Holland, Jeffrey Reddick, George A. Romero, Keith Arem, Richard Gray, also the late  Ray Bradbury, Wes Craven, plus many more. $19.99 in Print or $3.99 in eBook.