What Is A Jedi?


No, that’s what Obi Yawn did when he thought he defeated Anakin and left him to die on a bed of lava.

Yoda ran when Palpatine defeated him in battle.

The rest of the Jedi stood and fought (and died), but Luke always did things his way, ignoring the advice of both of his “Masters”.

When Yoda told Luke to stay out of the fight, don’t face Vader, and maybe let his friends die, Luke basically said, “No way, dude. See ya!”

When Ghost Kenobi reiterated Yoda’s advice, Luke basically said, “See Yoda. Ditto.” And flew off with R2D2 to do exactly what he wanted.

And why?

Because Obi Wan always told Luke to “Let go” and “Trust his feelings” and at that point, having caught his two Masters in a lie, Luke didn’t trust either of them.

Join us now as Luke’s X-Wing takes off, leaving behind a clearly frosted Yoda, who  snarls,

“Why Sith that Lord of son! Think he is, who does?”

Obi Yawn materializes saying,
“… Ahh… Nope. I… I’m sorry, what?”

Yoda, shaking with rage,
“Impertinent! Think who does he is? Jedi Me Long Before his lineage was!”

“Oh… the curt dressing down he gave you. Yes, that was… hm. That’s certainly him.”

“Too his father like! Much anger I sense!”

“I’d say more naive, overconfident, and a bit arrogant. Well, that’s what destroying a Death Star on your own will do to you.”

“No! NO! Much in him Anger Sensing! GRRR! ANGER!”

“Okay, Master Yoda. Although in fairness, you never killed hundreds of thousands of lives with a single shot. Not so much as a three-party tugboat”

“Hm! HM! Matters not!”

“Yes, well. Anyway, that boy is our last hope.”

“No, there is another.”

“Ho! You didn’t mangle that sentence, did you? But you can’t be talking about Leia.”

“Leia is.”

“One of these cold swamp stones has more human compassion than her. Leia saw her home planet blown to dust, billions of her people, their history, everything wiped out, and in minutes she was over it like that!”

Obi tries to snap his fingers.
“Like… that!”
several times, but fails.

Yoda sighs deeply.empire-yoda-obiwan “Ghost you are, remember? Physical not.”

“Oh, right.”



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