2016 and You’re Lookin’ Good, Twitter!

From 2010 through 2015, Twitter experienced unprecedented audience and profit growth under the leadership of CEO, Dick Costolo.

In 2013, Business Insider referred to Costello and Dorsey as two  of Silicon Valley’s 4 most impressive CEOs”. This was in reference to a luncheon Costello had with Dorsey and a few other shooting stars.

4 Of Silicon Valley’s Most Impressive CEOs Just Ate Dinner Together

In the same year, TIME Magazine named Costello and Dorsey as two of the 40 most influential minds in Tech.
Tech 40: The Most Influential Minds in Tech
Yet here’s the thing. While Jack Dorsey was able to co-create Twitter, he was unable to run it. Under his leadership, Twitter was a fast inflating bubble swelling out of a money pit.
Dick Costolo, on the other hand, brought a greater audience of people and greater profit to Twitter. He stabilized the company, putting it on a path to unsexy, but rock-solid growth.
Moreover, and this was discovered by accident through a leaked memo, Dick Costello brought to Twitter something that other tech giants are experiencing a famine in: a conscience. In the memo he said,

“We suck at dealing with abuse and trolls on the platform and we’ve sucked at it for years. It’s no secret and the rest of the world talks about it every day. We lose core user after core user by not addressing simple trolling issues that they face every day.

I’m frankly ashamed of how poorly we’ve dealt with this issue during my tenure as CEO. It’s absurd. There’s no excuse for it. I take full responsibility for not being more aggressive on this front. It’s nobody else’s fault but mine, and it’s embarrassing.”

Twitter CEO: ‘We suck at dealing with abuse’

Costello didn’t say this because he was busted or because he was arrested or because there was a tsunami of public outrage over Twitter. This virtually came out of nowhere and was unexpected. All tech companies from Amazon to Google to Microsoft to Apple and particularly Facebook, deal with these issues by shrugging them off.

They’re making money so FU.

Costello was about to shake up Twitter because he apparently has more heart and strength of character than anyone else leading the Tech Industry.

And yet this Conscientious Capitalist figured out how to do this while increasing audience and profitability. Not at a day trading junkbond king speed, but at a consistent speed all the same. The kind of rate that gives Warren Buffet a woody.

Yeah. Visualize that.

So the benighted majority share owning imbeciles at Twitter, forced that asshole out.

WT Actual F Why? Seems Costello era Twitter wasn’t reaching far greater unprecedented audience and profit growth at a faster rate during the same period of time.


Then they rehired Twitter board member and co-creator, Jack Dorsey – the man responsible for nearly driving Twitter into an early grave – as the replacement CEO!

The man whose vision and attention span is already split by being CEO of another unprofitable company, Square*, right across the street! Because, by unicorn, that’s how you run a successful company!

The Twitterpated (look it up) did this, you know, to turn the company around from it’s somewhat slower than the market analyst predicted unprecedented audience and profit growth.

Well true to form, Jack did exactly what Jack is famous for: Utterly destroying the value of a company and bringing Twitter to a market analyst UNpredicted (but still unprecedented) hemorrhaging loss of audience and profit.

Jack Dorsey can turn this around, of course. But it’s going to take a lot of what Jack does best: raise tons of investment capital for an unprofitable company.

Twitter’s darkest hour is now

*(should be mottos)
SQUARE: A Great Idea Poorly Executed Since 2010!
SQUARE: Adrift on a Bubble of Never-Ending Rounds of Capital Investment!
SQUARE: Invest In Us!  Just like Poor MC Hammer did!

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2 thoughts on “2016 and You’re Lookin’ Good, Twitter!

  1. I’m actually optimistic about Jack returning to Twitter, think of it similar to Steve Jobs. You could say he didn’t really know how to run a company, so he went off and build Pixar and NeXT and then came back anad made Apple “Cool again”. Now this is Jacks time to do the same.

    Liked by 1 person

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