It Was Cool The First Time
Okay, so anyone who is interested has heard about Amazon.com’s Jeff Bezos and his somewhat less successful company, Blue Origin launching a rocket into space (above the Karman line, anyway) and then bringing it back to earth and landing it.
If this is the first time you’ve heard about it, but I’ve piqued your interest, then here it is.
That was back in November 16, 2015.
It was very cool for many reasons, not the least of which is that when it comes to phallic rocket designs, the Blue Origin looks more like a dildo than all previous contenders. That’s a rocket powered penis, yo!
But now Jeff Bezos is getting boring. On January 23, 2016, he and Blue Origin – yawn – simply repeated themselves.
Seriously. When you drive a Lamborghini the first time, it’s a thrill and wild and cool. The second time you drive a Lamborghini it’s to pick up milk at the grocery.
Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin were the first men on the moon. Remember the names of the guys who were second?*
*Oh don’t go and Google it, ya dink. Here.
You want real action and thrills? Check out the awesome Michael Bay stylings of Elon Musk’s SpaceX!
BLOOIE! WHOA HO!
Space X has done this a few times. January 10, 2015. April 14, 2015 – CRS6. On June 28, 2015, CRS7 blew up during flight so that doesn’t really count.
However, on December 22, 2015, about a month after Blue Origin landed their Cock Rocket (which remains awesome for its, In Your Face, design!), Space X got together with the NASA mausoleum and successfully landed their space rocket too: Just to show they could do it if they really wanted to.
Then on January 17, 2016, Elon went back to doing what he does best: Stuff Exploding!
Elon pulled this off about a week before Jeff repeated himself.
When Elon isn’t blowing up rockets, he makes battery operated race cars with wing doors! Doors that lift up, not swing out! Doors that swing out are for losers. Winners want car doors that go up.
So to summarize, when Bezos returns to earth he simply walks through the door.
When Musk returns to earth he does it Hardcore! To the Extreme!
That’s why Elon Musk is freaking Metal and Jeff Bezos owns an online Walmart!
PERPETUAL BULLET: A Science Fiction Collection, will really give you a lift!
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Find it at (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Diesel, !ndigo, iTunes, KoboBooks, Smashwords, WHSmith, and more).
Also look for my story Cedo Looked Like People, in the anthology, FEAR THE REAPER, edited by Joe Mynhardt and available in Paperback and eBook.
Looking for a great guidebook on filmmaking? You’ll find industry informative interviews with Ray Bradbury, Wes Craven, John Carpenter, Tom Holland, Jeffrey Reddick, George A. Romero, me, and many others in HORROR 201: The Silver Scream.